[relationship] when we got argument

being a long distance relationship couple, we really have lesser time than others to meet up face to face, but we still get a chance to make each other mad haha! although we know we should treasure these valuable time that we are together…

last week i went to manila, the philippines again, that’s my 3rd time to be there. he picked me up as usual in the terminal 3 at burger king, and then drove to his home, thing went smoothly, until the 2nd night. he talked about the problems he is facing make him stressful, while hearing that, my tear couldn’t help to drop, he-is-wondered-why-i-was-cyring! gosh i’m a very typical cancer, with fluctuated emotion! actually that’s fine as that’s not his fault.

in the 3rd night, he had to leave me alone in the hotel because he needed to fix the hose in his condo, which had already made his room flooding. i were frustrated! how come he left me alone and we just had very little time spending together! plus, he always sticks with his iphone, i felt like ‘i don’t have a meaning/value to be here, why i need to take a flight to the ph’. all the disappointment made me to not to have eye contact, not talking to him (even i did, my voice is cold). but i were still willing to have lunch with him because i know i can’t be like that, i needed to give him a chance to talk with me haha! i had an outburst inside the japanese restaurant! i cried while eating ramen, why i need to look so poor! i bet the staff and other customers might peep at us… luckily he kept talking to me and tried his best to solve the problem immediately (if not solve at that time, he would definitely talk all with me at night right before sleep), he is such a rational & communicative gemini haha!

i think i should learn from him, and do the same if we have another argument.

 

on the other hand, if you want to make a woman calm down and have a better mood, you can try these:

1. let her calm down inside a very big shopping mall. yes i felt good after finishing the ramen with him and went to different malls in makati, manila. there’s a sale period during my visit, how lucky! trust me, it 100% works! my mood turned good when i bought 2 shoes for myself.
2. give her a warm hug. make her into your arms, sometimes we are tired during the fight.
3. say you understand her feeling, why she is disappointed. also there’s a twist, if the argument outbreak is due to some reason that isn’t his fault, like the case his hose was broken and had to fix immediately, told her that ‘i thought you would/are the 1st one to understand that’. when i heard it, i really felt bad to myself because i’m always the 1st one that he shares his problem/stress to. right after he said it, i immediately said sorry john -_-
4. say sorry. not only once.
5. kiss her forehead. do it when you think she has calmed already.
6. do sport together. at that night, we went to play bowling and really had big smiles on our face! endorphin works!

of course, mutual understanding and efficient communication are the best way to avoid unnecessary argument, wish you guys/us luck!

 

love,

h-

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[relationship] the way my man text

as you all may know, i’m in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend, and 90% of our communication is by texting via imessages (for your information, the other 5% is by facetime and the balance 5% by face to face talking. yesss i don’t really much like chatting on phone than the other girls, so i guess he is happy to have me, just don’t need to spend extra energy to handle lol). we met for almost half year, and below are some of his texting habits:

a good morning text to start our day-

and most of the time, he will send me a good morning text from monday to friday (maybe i told him once i’m so happy to receive his msg when i wake up), sometimes at 7am, 8am, 9 am, and the latest one should be at 11:45… yea not yet reach noon! good job bro! and usually i will wait til his first msg ’cause i know he must be busy on handling some shit task.

ily-

he always texts me ‘i love you’ more than i do, he is such a sweet (and flirty :P) guy! and that’s why he got soooo many ex-girlfriend (he told me, not sure if it’s true lol). and the most funniest thing is, he once was telling me he might go to consult a doctor due to stress or frustration from work/family/money, in a kind of bitter face, and then all of a sudden he said ‘i love you’, with that bitter face. omg i couldn’t help laughing! maybe he’s a gemini man and could change that fast in emotion, and maybe i shouldn’t laugh at that moment, but yes i did laughing and he’s just curious what on earth was happened! hummm he’s just so cute.

selfie-

maybe we couldn’t meet each other frequently, or maybe he’s just personally love taking photos, he always sends his selfie to me, just like to remind me his face/show me what he’s doing/where he is… i think he’s doing his boyfriend job well. ar! also he always tells me how his car’s doing… that’s a trouble old car which always has some parts to disorder and cause us to spend a lot…

no texting time-

i found that he usually stops texting me afternoon, most probably he got conferences at that time and really wanna finish the task so to leave office as early as possible (thanks to the traffic jam issue in manila, he needs to drive 2 hours back to home… poor!). i guess everybody especially men need more private space. and who would only have girlfriend/boyfriend in their life? we all have family, friends and colleagues to spend time with 🙂

just to have a friendly reminder, we don’t need to compare with/jealous each other on what kind of boyfriend/girlfriend we have, because that’s the person you picked at first! the way you guys have a comfortable and feel easy/free to handle the relationship, the one you should treasure on 🙂 rock on boys and girls! and to relax……..

 

h-

just a self-reminder of being in long distance relationship…

bear my laziness for not writing anything here, my mind is keeping blank in these days and still awaiting some news before planning my next trip in 2017… what i wanna say now is about long distance relationship which is starting to make me insecure (it’s just a month!) and therefore i’m writing to give myself back the initial mindset to cool down myself…

#1 – understanding

what an easy word but absolutely not an easy task to fully achieve it! you would wonder why he’s that busy and doesn’t send me even a goddamn short text! i have my work too but i could definitely spare some secs to check up my phone… nah, somehow work really drives people crazy while rushing for a big project in a goddamn tight deadline, he has seen the message but he couldn’t think of any good reply to say, and then he might prefer to hold it for awhile and then just simply forgot… as well as some research said that men isn’t good at multi-tasking, so better to think about we are more skillful and talent haha.

#2 – individuality

we got our own life and private zone. more important, we don’t wanna talk to anybody sometimes (and girls should know this feeling typically during the period!) be fair, men is also allowed to have ‘period’ time and just leave them alone, it’s also a kind of caring! too much text/call would make them feel annoyed (think about how we treat our mom’s murmur haha).

we have to love oneself before getting the ability to love him, so our emotion should be well controlled and not bring any negative vibe to our loved one. long distance relationship isn’t easy but why can’t we just enjoy and relax? you will understand nothing is really impossible when you see who’s the next american president, right? when you always thinking about it’s difficult and won’t last long, til a day, you would regret why you would behave like these coz your mindset was controlling your action.

#3 – live your life you remember

i have my family, friends, work, german class, and wordpress to spend time and energy, as well as go shopping, do some sports, and watch some korean variety shows and dramas… i could have so many things to do and not going to spend all my vitality to keep monitoring my mobile haha. never forget to live my life i remember, that’s one of my fav. lyrics from avicii, the nights. click the link to check it out, both music and mv is great.

let’s have strong belief to cope with all the difficulties together, j.

 

h-

starting my long distance relationship

just back from my paradise for 2 days, it’s the best time to have some throwback. remember what i mentioned i will have an impromptu trip to manila? yea there’s a special man living there so he’s the only reason i went there (of course who i met there are nice and helpful, however the government needa improves the traffic and environment). i took a half day off from work and then went directly to the airport, and i thought he waited for an hour because the custom was so slow… and i couldn’t connect the wifi while waiting.

here he was, met at the burger king, a kiss to my ear, hmm actually to my iphone earphone , and then all the way to the carpark, met his car (or i shld say his wife? he spent a lot on it) while interlocking fingers. ok, this is our first date since we met on june.

the view of manila, it’s stunning. honestly i didn’t expect the philippines could amaze me.

i think next time i should bring my swimsuit so i don’t waste time to wait his coming in the morning, argh! the hotel i stayed called 88 courtyard in pasay, which near ninoy airport terminal 3. the staff is nice 🙂 and there are restaurants and convenient stores nearby. recommend!

tagaytay, few hours drive from manila, thank him so much! so he remembered i wanna see volcano!! i didn’t search up any tourist spots and he did it wow. during the driving time, we listened to music with some singing and weird dance haha.

and he said he might come over hk on december… hmm seriously no expectation, no disappointment. he needa save hard for his living…. ah shld be his wife.

he kept asking me if i’m hungry all the time and i kept saying “no”. probably he’s the one to be hungry haha! so finally he took me to eat chinese food… and actually i didn’t try these combination in hk before! dumplings with lime? that bread called saobao but doesn’t have its traditional appearance haha. but still delicious.

of course, being a gemini-cancer girl, i’m fucking missing him and cried in front of him because the time we spent together is fucking limited, what he told me is to keep myself busy and then look at the instant pics we took -.- alright, that’s how cruel long distance relationship is and we shld be mature enough to face our challenge in our own city and support each other mentally. ok…. no more crying baby and overthinking, that’s suck. women shld be confident enough not to afraid men would treat, what a meant-to-be one never makes you feel that sick.

just wanna grow old with you, j.

h-